Ya, I just read Becoming Elisabeth Elliot and wrote a post asking similar questions. Vaughn doesn’t paint the second marriage as the downhill slope to control and submission, she paints Addison as the love of Elisabeth’s life and her intellectual equal, a short season where the two of them were deeply satisfied. And it seemed from the journal quotes that the relationship with Van was already growing distant.
And then the quotes from the year before the third marriage show aching loneliness. I wonder how much there was deep pain and trauma from the loss of a second husband in a way that was long and filled with suffering, and it was unprocessed. And then she was lonely, with Val having also moved away to college. She was achingly lonely, and that view of submission was already set, and so she entered into the marriage looking for relief. To not be alone, to be cared for. I am seeing someone close to me step into a marriage after a traumatic loss of a spouse to cancer, and I wonder about this...
Her views on submission were already set by the time she entered that marriage but they also seem right in line with the severity with which she viewed following God and willingly passing through suffering. I disagree with her but it seems she was consistent.
Vaughn also pointed out that Elliot was assigned to write a book on Israel (or was it Jerusalem?) and that was quite an intellectual process for her. In the end the secular world would not publish the book, and Cappa was deeply disappointed in her. I wonder if she sort of received two clap backs - one from the evangelical world after her novel, but then also from the secular world for her writings on Israel. And so she retreated for a while to passionate love and then great suffering, came out changed and entered into that controlling third marriage for relief and was boxed into a corner.
I don’t understand it though. The third marriage and who she became during those long years. And I too, though I myself AM a missionary, find myself in that single phase of hers, disillusioned with the American Christian establishment.
Having done my missionary time, and now being in my love/ultimate redemption period, I almost passed on this essay when I saw Elliot’s name. But I’m glad I didn’t. Thanks.
i think you are likely projecting ;-) but I enjoyed the read nonetheless. I think staying fierce is dreadfully hard for women, you are certainly right about that.
I know there there probably are people who passed on this but I was excited to see 2500 words on Elliot. I have had such mixed views of her work- we didn’t even dip into Let Me Be A Woman. There is no way to verify this but your first footnote about her makes me wonder if she was neurodivergent. I hate that she was forced back into her box instead of being allowed to blossom into something unexpected.
Yes, reading this biography, I absolutely wondered about her being neurodivergent. It makes sense to me! (And tbh this has been my most-read sub stack post, so I guess a lot of us still have curiosities about EE!)
I wanted to read you 2500 word essay on Elisabeth Elliot and I'm glad I did. She was on the edges of my awareness growing up in Christian culture in the late 80's and early 90's. I had no idea the arch of her life-very thought provoking. I don't think I'll be reading the book, but this essay has given me much to consider. Good luck with the new edition of your book.
I haven't (probably won't) read the biography, but you read Eliot as I have. I went to a retreat in California led by her brother Tom Howard once--another strange egg who went the conservative route to structured Catholicism. Strong families can be good and bad....
It sounds like Tom was one of her closest friends throughout her adult life. Her move to the episcopal church was also a move to an even more structured, hierarchical life...Austen suggested that Elliot may have wanted to move with Tom to the Catholic Church, too.
What a personal, compelling review and exploration, Amy! You inspire me as a reader, thinker, teacher, writer, and friend. Thanks so much for this. I'm excited to share it with R — we were talking about the nature of what this kind of 'submitting to husbands' eclipses and damages two days ago. What you've offered here feels like a truly helpful way to deepen and continue that conversation. Bless you!
Appreciate that you took the time to write this (and well done for powering through 500 pages in a week). I read Passion & Purity in college, alongside "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" (insert melting face emoji) and so so much of my understanding of Elisabeth Elliot was that prudish, submissive, conservative Christian. The woman you describe in her mid-life, post Jim, pre-Leitch, sounds way more up my street. And the thought of diving back into a boundaried, boxed-in, submissive self after tasting the spaciousness of Only Love and ultimate redemption leaves me stricken with horror.
I really enjoyed reading it -- it just felt so tragic to see that mid-life shift, and then to think of the consequences not only for her and Van, but for such a broad swath of American christianity...
Ya, I just read Becoming Elisabeth Elliot and wrote a post asking similar questions. Vaughn doesn’t paint the second marriage as the downhill slope to control and submission, she paints Addison as the love of Elisabeth’s life and her intellectual equal, a short season where the two of them were deeply satisfied. And it seemed from the journal quotes that the relationship with Van was already growing distant.
And then the quotes from the year before the third marriage show aching loneliness. I wonder how much there was deep pain and trauma from the loss of a second husband in a way that was long and filled with suffering, and it was unprocessed. And then she was lonely, with Val having also moved away to college. She was achingly lonely, and that view of submission was already set, and so she entered into the marriage looking for relief. To not be alone, to be cared for. I am seeing someone close to me step into a marriage after a traumatic loss of a spouse to cancer, and I wonder about this...
Her views on submission were already set by the time she entered that marriage but they also seem right in line with the severity with which she viewed following God and willingly passing through suffering. I disagree with her but it seems she was consistent.
Vaughn also pointed out that Elliot was assigned to write a book on Israel (or was it Jerusalem?) and that was quite an intellectual process for her. In the end the secular world would not publish the book, and Cappa was deeply disappointed in her. I wonder if she sort of received two clap backs - one from the evangelical world after her novel, but then also from the secular world for her writings on Israel. And so she retreated for a while to passionate love and then great suffering, came out changed and entered into that controlling third marriage for relief and was boxed into a corner.
I don’t understand it though. The third marriage and who she became during those long years. And I too, though I myself AM a missionary, find myself in that single phase of hers, disillusioned with the American Christian establishment.
Two clap backs -- from the evangelical world and from the secular world -- good insight.
Having done my missionary time, and now being in my love/ultimate redemption period, I almost passed on this essay when I saw Elliot’s name. But I’m glad I didn’t. Thanks.
Thank you for reading! I understand the impulse to pass.
i think you are likely projecting ;-) but I enjoyed the read nonetheless. I think staying fierce is dreadfully hard for women, you are certainly right about that.
I know there there probably are people who passed on this but I was excited to see 2500 words on Elliot. I have had such mixed views of her work- we didn’t even dip into Let Me Be A Woman. There is no way to verify this but your first footnote about her makes me wonder if she was neurodivergent. I hate that she was forced back into her box instead of being allowed to blossom into something unexpected.
Yes, reading this biography, I absolutely wondered about her being neurodivergent. It makes sense to me! (And tbh this has been my most-read sub stack post, so I guess a lot of us still have curiosities about EE!)
Thank you for this essay. People contain multitudes. This makes me so sad that she lost that open, expansive idea of God's love and his kingdom.
And tragic for Van, too!
I wanted to read you 2500 word essay on Elisabeth Elliot and I'm glad I did. She was on the edges of my awareness growing up in Christian culture in the late 80's and early 90's. I had no idea the arch of her life-very thought provoking. I don't think I'll be reading the book, but this essay has given me much to consider. Good luck with the new edition of your book.
thanks Amy!
I haven't (probably won't) read the biography, but you read Eliot as I have. I went to a retreat in California led by her brother Tom Howard once--another strange egg who went the conservative route to structured Catholicism. Strong families can be good and bad....
It sounds like Tom was one of her closest friends throughout her adult life. Her move to the episcopal church was also a move to an even more structured, hierarchical life...Austen suggested that Elliot may have wanted to move with Tom to the Catholic Church, too.
What a personal, compelling review and exploration, Amy! You inspire me as a reader, thinker, teacher, writer, and friend. Thanks so much for this. I'm excited to share it with R — we were talking about the nature of what this kind of 'submitting to husbands' eclipses and damages two days ago. What you've offered here feels like a truly helpful way to deepen and continue that conversation. Bless you!
Thank you, Michael. We should get together and talk more about it!
I love this, Amy!! You captured situations we’ve struggled through, perfectly. Blessings….
Thanks, Connie 💚
I feel the urgency to understand this too. A wonderful piece.
Thanks, C.
Appreciate that you took the time to write this (and well done for powering through 500 pages in a week). I read Passion & Purity in college, alongside "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" (insert melting face emoji) and so so much of my understanding of Elisabeth Elliot was that prudish, submissive, conservative Christian. The woman you describe in her mid-life, post Jim, pre-Leitch, sounds way more up my street. And the thought of diving back into a boundaried, boxed-in, submissive self after tasting the spaciousness of Only Love and ultimate redemption leaves me stricken with horror.
Same!
I really enjoyed reading it -- it just felt so tragic to see that mid-life shift, and then to think of the consequences not only for her and Van, but for such a broad swath of American christianity...
This was really interesting! Thank you. I just finished Austen's bio of Elliot too, and so much of what you say makes sense.